How Aging Shapes Our Interior Design Choices

And why it's okay to admit that aging can influence our design style

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Now, let’s get back to today’s story, this one’s been on my mind all afternoon...

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Okay, so I was standing in my home office today with a pile of stuff in my hands that I was sorting and moving around and suddenly thought to myself, “This room doesn’t look or feel like me at all”. Omg NO. As in, this space is crying for a major overhaul.

Then, I started to laugh out loud because I honestly never thought I’d be so over this room, with its Farrow & Ball Pink Ground walls (still beautiful but no longer me) and wall-to-wall custom-hack desk from IKEA, Muuto Stacked bookcase, and a mix of other things that just don’t work together anymore, or even in my home, and certainly feel like most of the dresses in my closet - simply NOT FITTING.

What the hell happened? (To my home, not my body, though I question both.)

Well, for one, I’m a decade older since I brought these things into my home. Some of these things came to live with me 15 years ago. We’re talking the same time-frame when the KEEP CALM poster was in every blogger home on Pinterest.

I used to believe my design taste was something fixed, I remember turning 35 and decorating my new German apartment in a very Scandi way thinking, wow - this is SO me! The pale tones, the all-white walls, my IKEA white kitchen with the wood butcher block counters, my vintage white vase collection from East Germany. I loved my style. It felt like my signature, one I’d keep forever. And some of that stuff, I’ve left but returned to. Like the all white walls - which I’ve been craving again, oddly.

But over the past decade, I’ve watched it quietly shift. Slowly, at first, but suddenly things feel a lot faster now and I feel like my home style stayed in the past while I moved forward. And not because of trends or Pinterest algorithms.

It’s deeper than that.

It’s because I’ve changed.

And with that, so have my interiors.

I’m breaking up with my decor style.

Aging has an interesting way of refining what we want to live with. What we once tolerated in our 20s or 30s like cheap furniture, loud prints, uncomfortable chairs, clutter for the sake of “stuff”, starts to feel like background noise we no longer have the patience for.

We begin to crave clarity.

Comfort.

Beauty that serves a purpose.

We start to Get Real about our interiors.

Less Is Finally More

Back when I started my blog in 2006, I wanted everything. Gallery walls bursting with art, shelves meticulously styled, a fabulous designer chair or vase. But over time, I started to see the power in EDITING, in restraint. I realized that a single meaningful object, well-placed and loved, could say more about me than a dozen trinkets ever could. That I don’t need all the things that I have to enjoy my home. In fact, I can enjoy it more with less around me.

Now, I design with more intention. At least, I’m getting there.

I buy less, but better.

I think about the long-term, not just how something looks, but how it will feel to live with it over time.

And I crave open space and less objects.

I crave feeling like there is still so much time to do the things that I love, to be the person I wish to be, to see the places I long to see and have enough room in my life to show all of that.

Right now with a full house, I feel like there is no room left to bring in anything.

I feel like a person who has lived a full and very beautiful life - but that it’s sorta over. I know that sounds sad, but it’s how living in a full house feels to me. Like this is it, I’ve done it all. And it depresses me to feel finished. Which is why I’m selling off a lot of my belongings by the end of this year to make room for the years ahead. To clear space for what’s coming. To have an open spot on my wall to add a beloved new piece of furniture, to have a free place for a new painting acquired from a wonderful adventure I have yet to take.

Comfort Takes the Lead

Also, I came out of Corona realizing that comfort isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity. Aging teaches us this too, but mostly because when we’re older we tend to be home more often than our younger friends. We tend to take more time on the sofa and chair, in the bed, or lounging in general once we hit a certain age. I’m not there yet, but I do work from home so I’m in my house a lot.

During Corona, we were ALL home ALL the time and so even young people started to crave comfortable and cozy spaces.

A beautiful sofa isn’t worth much if you can’t relax into it.

And that stylish Danish chair? If it pinches our ass because it’s too narrow, or isn’t deep enough to curl up in, it’s out. The only thing I want pinching my ass is my husband!

This applies emotionally, too. Our home should comfort us after a long day, not compete for attention. It should feel like a hug, not a showroom.

Design, as I’ve learned, must support your life and not just look good in photos. But, if you are an Insta queen and want your home to look Insta perfect, I won’t shame you there. You can and have the right to stage your home for social. If that’s the case, here is also a little photo trick for you - the favorite go-to of stylists and photographers like me. If you happen to have a very un-photogenic piece of furniture in a room that you love, and your home is being photographed for a magazine or book, or you are sharing it on your social, simply pull out the piece you don’t like during the shoot and place it back in after you have your photos. EASY! It’s like hiding the cords and the TV. Just make the ugly, but cozy, chair disappear! :)

Honest Design

I used to design to impress, a little bit at least, if I’m honest. There was always the invisible judge-y guest walking through my home, someone I imagined would mock my taste or compare me to others. That guest was called ALL OF YOU. The internet. Instagram. My blog readers. At least I thought so. Yet, I’ve realized by none that most of you love me and what I do no matter what. And you’re not here to judge. The only real judge was myself.

Now, I am designing more for me. For my family. For our rituals, our parties, our quiet evenings.

I’ve even started bringing out old things I once hid, heirlooms from my mom, auntie, and grandmother, old photos, personal family photos (remember those? So many of us don’t have family photos in our homes anymore) things that my son made in art class. These pieces hold stories. They make a home mine.

We Honor Where We Are, And Where We're Going

Interior design at this stage of life has become a kind of mirror. It reflects where we've been, yes, but also where we’re headed or where we hope to be. It’s not about perfection. It’s about alignment. Integrity. Ease.

If you’ve found yourself gravitating towards a calmer home, cozier textures, simpler layouts, less stuff, you’re not becoming boring. Maybe older. Definitely wiser. Most certainly smarter. But never boring. You’re evolving. You’re growing. You’re learning what matters most.

And that’s the most beautiful design evolution you can ask for. To be able to say TA-DA! I’m happy with my stuff. I like my space. This is ME.

What about you? Have you noticed your style changing over time? I’d love to hear how age has shaped your choices, drop me a comment or hit reply. Let’s talk about how we’re designing lives (and homes) we truly love.