I'm Here, So Now What?

Tell me what you want, what you really, really want...

Yoooo hoooo…. Here I am again, writing for the 2nd time on Substack and feeling a bit green, unsteady, new kid at school-ish yet still… Very excited and happy to be here with all of you.

Starting to write in a new place, other than my blog and magazines for 16 years, feels like stage fright. I know this feeling all to well because I’ve given lectures for many years and I still feel jittery before I go before an audience. Pre-show jitters is a feeling that I’ve honestly grown to respect and love because it give me the signal that I’m about to have the time of my life - it’s excitement wrapped in fear, tied with a bow of pure adrenaline. Stepping on stage fills me with energy, pumps me up, it’s challenging, pure and authentic. Once I step on stage and feel the vibe of the crowd, I’m inspired and at home. I’ll also need a timer and some slides to follow or else I won’t stay on topic and I’ll never stop talking. Not much different when I write and why the many editors I’ve had in my career love me so much. (ha ha)

Publishing online is a very similar experience for me - fear wrapped in pure joy - as I go before my online audience. I’m always reluctant to put my voice out there, to step onto the often very critical stage that is the internet, but I’ve done it so many times now that it’s become the most natural thing in the world - to stand before people openly and pray they don’t get up and leave the room.

Yet, for the past few years, there was something missing in my blog, in my work, and I couldn’t pinpoint it. In fact, I didn’t realize it exactly until I wrote the paragraph before this one. [Not even kidding. I had an epiphany less than 3 seconds ago.]

Blogging on decor8 and posting on Instagram no longer gave me pre-show jitters. I wasn’t a little bit shy or scared. I wasn’t excited. I became almost robotic and just wrote stuff. I was going through the motions, without much passion, kinda on autopilot.

Tapping away on my keyboard here on Substack in a very white, very new environment feels like I’m starting over again. A clean slate. I feel like I’m starting as a very unknown Holly Becker and that decor8 is launching for the first time but not as a blog, but as some type or organically evolving digital journal of sorts.

Sure, I’ll still post a few times a month on decor8 to keep it fresh and to satisfy SEO and my dear fans there who have stuck by my side for years, but I’ve decided to resign to my former blogger/influencer life and evolve in a new direction. I’ve decided to allow myself and my work to grow again - to see where it goes - just as I did when I first wrote on decor8 nearly 17 years ago.

In order to move forward, or make changes in life, it’s essential to check the rear view mirror. You need to know where you’re coming from and what is behind you so you can figure out where to go.

The one thing that I had to do in order to show up here was to leave behind personal expectations and those from what I perceived my audience has. I’m allowed to evolve, I’m ready, this isn’t career suicide, this is movement and it’s needed. If there’s one thing that entrepreneurs must honor is to be true to themselves which means to stay in love with their profession at least most days of the week.

If we don’t wake up and feel motivated, something has to give. To press on yet feel uninspired, bored, and disinterested is to slowly stagnate and die. Just writing that sentence depresses me because I recall how I felt exactly this way recently and knew that I owed it to myself to find work that inspires me once again.

We often have to pivot, to abandon what doesn’t work, to change things up, and to step beyond what’s comfortable in order to find paths that bring us to our next set of dreams. Leaving behind some comfort zones can be hard work but essential to leveling up.

Think about it. Most people have to get UNSTUCK at least a few times in life. Whether it’s a career change, partner change, divorce, Corona rut, major life upheaval (my mom died last summer and I fell into a year-long hole) whatever it is…

Yet at some point in your moment of stuck-ness it becomes very apparent that talking about how and why you got there no longer serves you. The only thing that matters is to pull yourself out and move forward.

If the rut is depression, then you may need to seek professional, loving mental health care but even then, you will ultimately be given regular exercises to practice that will help you to move on. Learning and moving on is the only way you can gain back control after a rut so that you can change your story.

Ok! So let’s talk about this space and what will I do with it that will differ from decor8. I imagine to create a beautiful, informative journal for you to explore and enjoy away from all of the noise of Instagram, Facebook, and social media in general in more of a structured way so that you will know what to expect.

My topics will be all around design, decor, wonderfully inspiring people, creative friends of mine that you can meet, some travel stories as I go to new cities, and lots of honest and open content on topics close to my heart - running a freelance business, expat life, designing for the senses, handmade and vintage, flowers and plants, some women’s issues, and all things related to decor which is really the topic that I could write on forever and always.

You can access me here on the Substack app by clicking subscribe below (it’s free), then you’ll never miss anything that I publish.

Thank you for supporting me, and for giving me a chance to write for you in a new space. I’m very happy to be here.

So… Tell me… What would you love for me to talk about here? Can you pick some topics to get me started? I’d love your feedback. :)