Coffee Dates, Connection, and Magic Making

I just have to tell you about part of my day today that went from mega FRUSTRATING to very inspiring and invigorating in a matter of an hour.

The frustrating part was simply this: Truly to motivate myself to put on nice clothes, hop on the u-bahn, and go downtown and face actual humans. I simply wasn’t feeling it. I felt like I should remain tucked into my warm home with my head down - no fancy macha lattes, no distraction, messy hair piled on my head, reading tax letters and making my way through emails.

But I also felt a gentle tug - that other voice on my shoulder whispering that I really need to cut the crap and leave the house. Even more so because a favorite former student of mine, Anne, asked me out for coffee, I couldn’t cancel, and I really did want to see her. Then I thought,

She may be pushing herself out to see me as well.

That was all the motivation I needed to stand freezing on the platform waiting for the next train.

Anne’s a local designer living not far from me here in Hannover, Germany, and we share quite a few common threads—she's an English speaker, a creative self-employed designer, and a mom.

I arrived to the cafe first, found a seat, and started to ease out of my discomfort and into the cafe vibe - the smell of coffee, the whispers coming from tables nearby, the familiar 80’s song of my childhood - Cruel Summer - by Bananarama. Somehow listening to Cruel Summer on a very cold winter’s day made me giggle - the irony.

When Anne appeared, I felt an instant boost in my mood - it was so lovely seeing her again after a year! And our conversation flowed so effortlessly, making our one-hour coffee date expand into over two hours. In fact, when it was time for me to go, I was reluctant - what a change from earlier when I was fighting to leave the my house. Now I was struggling to return.

But something else wonderful happened there together with Anne. Another dear person, Denise, came in and took a seat nearby — I recognized her immediately and called out to her. Her warm smile was pure sunshine. Denise is a professional actress - we met last year at the Hannover Opera Ball, where she was the moderator of the evening. We had connected briefly that night and continued to stay in touch through Instagram since then. Seeing her today was a great surprise, and even better, she connected instantly with Anne. Before we knew it, our table was now a trio - she joined us.

Denise, Anne and I today in Hannover. :)

I’ve always had this innate talent for connecting people, I don’t mean to brag, but it is my knack - I’ve been a connector since I was a child and I consider it a privilege because I know it’s quite rare - most people don’t even think about connecting others, while others want to keep good connections to themselves and then there are the poor souls prone to jealousy who don’t always enjoy helping others (which is sad).

But yeah, I’m a very enthusiastic connector. I see links everywhere, in everyone. It’s fulfilling for me to link individuals to opportunities that can enrich their lives and help them to grow and expand, thrive even. I beleive there's beauty in weaving together the right people at the right time, though I must admit - I’ve also learned the hard way that not everyone has the purest intentions so I have to be careful as a connector type. Yet, every encounter has shaped me, good and not-so-good, and I've emerged with better ability to discern who deserves my time and energy and who doesn’t.

Today was about connection - flow - purity - the magic of putting people together from different creative disciplines yet it all just works. Where the three of us explored the endless possibilities of collaboration and support within our local community. Our passion for connection and how hard it can be to work alone - especially in the long winter months. We brainstormed ways to cultivate connections that could counteract the solitude and sometimes even depressed feelings so often felt in the freelance world. Rather than overthinking our plans, we opted for a 'go with the flow' philosophy and decided to dive right in.

When I finally left, I felt invigorated and surprisingly connected—something I often miss in my self-employed life. The usual sense of isolation and, I’ll admit, occassional lonliness, was replaced by a renewed sense of purpose and empowerment. I’m an extrovert to the core, so isolation is creative death to me after a day or two alone at home.

Today turned out to be a perfect opportunity for us to share ideas and even lay the groundwork for a new group we formed in those two hours together which will be focused on fostering community here in Hannover. We’re determined to keep this momentum going and will be launching our idea publicly very soon—so if you're in Hannover, stay tuned for more details!

As I think back on today's experience, I want to encourage you to seek out genuine, personal interactions in your local community. PUSH YOURSELF out of the house.

We often find ourselves lost in social media, spending hours crafting posts on Substack so we can call like-minded souls to us. And that’s good. But living mostly online can be lonely. We can’t forget the warmth of real-life connections—the laughter shared over coffee, the comfort of a good conversation, that twinkle in someone’s eyes when they see us, or simply the joy of being in someone's presence.

We also can’t forget the SPEED of new things forming when you meet someone in person. An idea can grow super fast and end up being launched a day later when you sit around a table with someone. Online, those same ideas can take weeks and months to evolve and sadly, most never see the light of day.

Face-to-face is where I personally find so much MAGIC and JOY and CONNECTION. God, I love it.

So, please, reach out to a friend this week. Meet at a café, share a meal, or simply enjoy each other’s company. Put a friend on your calender once a week no matter what. It’s a small step that can lead to meaningful moments. Dress up a little, step outside, and savor being present and in the moment - no goals, no intentions - just to be there and to connect with another living soul.

PUSH YOUR RELUCTANT ASS OUT THE DOOR. :)

Since Corona, which seems like a decade ago already, the world has shifted, and while social media serves its purpose, it can’t replace the richness of human interaction. There’s an entire world of beauty, innovation, rawness, and very real experiences waiting for us beyond Substack, Insta and the neverending stream of content flying at our faces all day. Get out there and CONNECT.

The truest connections are made in the touch of a hand - in the warmth of presence, in laughter and love - we glow.