I can definitely relate to this! I’ve found that when I’m stuck in my head-overthinking things-I have to get up and physically move! A long walk, a run or a concert, preferably with dancing and laughing involved -anything to physically shift the energy to other parts of my body usually helps!
That is such a great reminder. Exercise and movement is awesome. A beautiful new gym just opened next door, like a block and half from my house, so I'm thinking to begin my days there 4 times a week and see if this helps me get out of my head.
I absolutely agree. Isn't perfectionism a mechanism to protect ourselves from failure? Well, I guess if we don't do anything at all, we can't fail. But that's, most likely, a misconception because if we overthink everything and don't get to doing things, then we can't win anything either. Luckily, it seems as though the trend is moving away from all the styled, perfect-life imagery we've seen on social media (particularly Instagram) over the last years - and that's a good thing to take the pressure off a bit. After all, we're all just human and "done is better than perfect", right?
This is something I struggle with too. Sometimes my newsletters are more than a week late because I'm just - not finding the - *something* - to launch the damn thing into the world.
But two years in, I think I'm starting to learn what my brain is doing. Sometimes it feels like I'm procrastinating or just being timid, where *actually* what I'm doing is recognising that the newsletter I have is a good 65-75% idea, and deep down I think it has the potential to be a rocking 80% or upwards. So I hang onto it, and create delays that force me to do what I think of as "circling the writing": doing more reading, interrogating myself, trying to bring something new into it, some extra ingredient to make a new flavour, or colour to make a new shade. And it's still the work. It's still working on it.
This isn't always true. Sometimes I'm kidding myself and I should just hit publish. But - most of the time, the pieces that I've held onto "for too long" while I circled the writing for days and days, they're the ones that get the most comments, shares and engagement (and paid signups). They're the good stuff. Something is working.
I suspect none of this is remotely useful to anyone and I'm just jawing because I like the sound of my own voice. But just wanted to say: I feel this too. So often. Maybe all the time. And pretty much everyone I've talked to feels it too. So maybe it's not a sign something's not coming together in your mind. Maybe it's the opposite?
Wow, great thoughts and thank you for the comment MIke. Yeah I have loads of drafts lately, more than ever, I think it's mostly because I am exposed to many opinions and ideas online that I often wonder what can I contribute to this global non-stop conversation that is different or unique. I worry too much about offering something really new or unheard of - which is so silly - but I do think "what can I say that will contribute to all of this blah blah!"... You know?
Also, journalism and overall writing quality has significantly decreased over the years - even popular newspapers are loaded with errors and most seem to be written by bots, or marketing experts, or college interns... It's also that. I don't want to contribute to more mediocre writing so I often hold back unless what I write is stellar... And trust me, my stellar is not a 10 by no means, but when compared to most of what I read online, it's definitely better than mediocre or horrific. ha ha.
Anyway, you can comment here anytime and we can talk about this topic, I'm happy to do so. I miss the early blogging days when I had loads of comments and often those were better than the original topic I'd posted. I'm hoping being on Substack can give me back some of those quality commenters - like you - I need the fuel from others to keep going...
Love this so much. And think (haha) it has to do with getting older, realizing that life is not infinite, and wanting to make the best of this time we have on earth ... But agree, "Just DO it" is the answer. Thank you for putting your thoughts into my inbox!!!
Such a timely post! I usually do a creative-based task or go for a nature walk to help me focus on something else. As noted below, “done is better than perfect”… a good mantra for us over-thinkers :)
Oh my goodness Holly, I can so relate to this as well. Especially lately as I embarked on new subject matter in my painting. I definitely find being in nature or exercising helps shift resistance providing that "can do" attitude. When the mind gets stuck, it really is helpful to shift into a different activity in order to jolt it out of that rut. Thanks for sharing! xx
I wrestle with perfectionist tendencies, too, and what I’ve found helpful is to ask myself what evolutionary use they may have had and then recognise that they may not be useful anymore. For example, you can imagine how perfectionism may have helped early humans optimise their stone tools, tweak their shelter to maximise comfort for them and their families, etc. But in our current age of abundance, we have so many opportunities that it’s more important to try a lot of things and see what works. The whole exercise helps me be compassionate with myself, give myself permission to feel what I’m feeling and then let it go.
Excellent thoughts David, you're right, most of what I do is not as important as optimizing my stone tools so to say... It's deciding to go to the gym or post another article about home design or which class I should teach next, etc. It's funny but you're right, we ruminate over things that don't matter so much in the grand scheme of things. The important part is to just take action and do more - then you also have a buffer when you fail, as you haven't done just one thing and failed at it - you've done maybe 10 things and failed at a few - definitely softens the blow. :)
Loved this article. There was so much to relate to. And while I do understand the root cause of over thinking yet I'm unable to bring myself to that point of taking action without thinking it out over and over again. It just feels next to impossible to take that leap of faith and get into the mode of JUST DO IT!
Solidarity!
Yippee!
So well put, Holly! I can definitely relate!
Thank you Jennifer, are you also on Substack or still blogging?
I can definitely relate to this! I’ve found that when I’m stuck in my head-overthinking things-I have to get up and physically move! A long walk, a run or a concert, preferably with dancing and laughing involved -anything to physically shift the energy to other parts of my body usually helps!
That is such a great reminder. Exercise and movement is awesome. A beautiful new gym just opened next door, like a block and half from my house, so I'm thinking to begin my days there 4 times a week and see if this helps me get out of my head.
I just laughed at myself - there I go again, "I'm thinking to begin my days..." I need to DO not THINK.
I absolutely agree. Isn't perfectionism a mechanism to protect ourselves from failure? Well, I guess if we don't do anything at all, we can't fail. But that's, most likely, a misconception because if we overthink everything and don't get to doing things, then we can't win anything either. Luckily, it seems as though the trend is moving away from all the styled, perfect-life imagery we've seen on social media (particularly Instagram) over the last years - and that's a good thing to take the pressure off a bit. After all, we're all just human and "done is better than perfect", right?
That's a great thought, "Done is better than perfect".
Brilliant article. Thanks Holly. A great read!
Oh Karen thanks so much!
This is something I struggle with too. Sometimes my newsletters are more than a week late because I'm just - not finding the - *something* - to launch the damn thing into the world.
But two years in, I think I'm starting to learn what my brain is doing. Sometimes it feels like I'm procrastinating or just being timid, where *actually* what I'm doing is recognising that the newsletter I have is a good 65-75% idea, and deep down I think it has the potential to be a rocking 80% or upwards. So I hang onto it, and create delays that force me to do what I think of as "circling the writing": doing more reading, interrogating myself, trying to bring something new into it, some extra ingredient to make a new flavour, or colour to make a new shade. And it's still the work. It's still working on it.
This isn't always true. Sometimes I'm kidding myself and I should just hit publish. But - most of the time, the pieces that I've held onto "for too long" while I circled the writing for days and days, they're the ones that get the most comments, shares and engagement (and paid signups). They're the good stuff. Something is working.
I suspect none of this is remotely useful to anyone and I'm just jawing because I like the sound of my own voice. But just wanted to say: I feel this too. So often. Maybe all the time. And pretty much everyone I've talked to feels it too. So maybe it's not a sign something's not coming together in your mind. Maybe it's the opposite?
Wow, great thoughts and thank you for the comment MIke. Yeah I have loads of drafts lately, more than ever, I think it's mostly because I am exposed to many opinions and ideas online that I often wonder what can I contribute to this global non-stop conversation that is different or unique. I worry too much about offering something really new or unheard of - which is so silly - but I do think "what can I say that will contribute to all of this blah blah!"... You know?
Also, journalism and overall writing quality has significantly decreased over the years - even popular newspapers are loaded with errors and most seem to be written by bots, or marketing experts, or college interns... It's also that. I don't want to contribute to more mediocre writing so I often hold back unless what I write is stellar... And trust me, my stellar is not a 10 by no means, but when compared to most of what I read online, it's definitely better than mediocre or horrific. ha ha.
Anyway, you can comment here anytime and we can talk about this topic, I'm happy to do so. I miss the early blogging days when I had loads of comments and often those were better than the original topic I'd posted. I'm hoping being on Substack can give me back some of those quality commenters - like you - I need the fuel from others to keep going...
Love this so much. And think (haha) it has to do with getting older, realizing that life is not infinite, and wanting to make the best of this time we have on earth ... But agree, "Just DO it" is the answer. Thank you for putting your thoughts into my inbox!!!
You're welcome, I'm so happy that you stopped by today to read me. :)
Such a timely post! I usually do a creative-based task or go for a nature walk to help me focus on something else. As noted below, “done is better than perfect”… a good mantra for us over-thinkers :)
I love this idea, wonderful!
Oh my goodness Holly, I can so relate to this as well. Especially lately as I embarked on new subject matter in my painting. I definitely find being in nature or exercising helps shift resistance providing that "can do" attitude. When the mind gets stuck, it really is helpful to shift into a different activity in order to jolt it out of that rut. Thanks for sharing! xx
I wrestle with perfectionist tendencies, too, and what I’ve found helpful is to ask myself what evolutionary use they may have had and then recognise that they may not be useful anymore. For example, you can imagine how perfectionism may have helped early humans optimise their stone tools, tweak their shelter to maximise comfort for them and their families, etc. But in our current age of abundance, we have so many opportunities that it’s more important to try a lot of things and see what works. The whole exercise helps me be compassionate with myself, give myself permission to feel what I’m feeling and then let it go.
Excellent thoughts David, you're right, most of what I do is not as important as optimizing my stone tools so to say... It's deciding to go to the gym or post another article about home design or which class I should teach next, etc. It's funny but you're right, we ruminate over things that don't matter so much in the grand scheme of things. The important part is to just take action and do more - then you also have a buffer when you fail, as you haven't done just one thing and failed at it - you've done maybe 10 things and failed at a few - definitely softens the blow. :)
Loved this article. There was so much to relate to. And while I do understand the root cause of over thinking yet I'm unable to bring myself to that point of taking action without thinking it out over and over again. It just feels next to impossible to take that leap of faith and get into the mode of JUST DO IT!